Let’s Find Happiness Everyday

Happy EverydayLately I’ve seen quite a few posts on social media from people worried that they haven’t found their life purpose. The assumption is that we all “should” have a purpose. While I’m not saying that finding your purpose is wrong or bad, if you’re stressing out or worried about it, that’s probably creating a barrier to you finding it. For when you struggle to find something, you’re going to create more struggle and you’ll keep searching. When you compare yourself with other peoples’ versions of themselves,  you can end up feeling you don’t measure up to their version of success. This is destructive to your own self. Self-love and acceptance are pre-requisites to finding your passions and purposes in life!

If we think about life in general, isn’t being happy the point of it all? What makes you happy may not be what makes another feel the same way. That’s the beauty of the diversity of our choices in life: there’s no “one size fits all.”

What makes you happy may change over time.  What made you happy at age 7 might not be the same at age 47. What brightened your day yesterday may not be the thing that brightens it today.  The journey of life serves us well in discovering our passions, in creating a life of joy, and following what may be more than one “purpose” in our lives.

In my own life, I have been aware of having many passions over time. Growing up, music was my life. I loved to sing and perform and thought I wanted to become a professional singer. I played the clarinet, and taught myself guitar and a bit of piano. I also loved to write and wrote poetry, songs and short stories. I loved theater as well and did every play and musical theater that was offered in my school. I loved taking pictures and photography and took many photos over the years. I loved learning languages, too, and ended up studying abroad twice in high school and once in college and eventually earning a degree in Spanish. I also loved discussing things and felt particularly drawn to politics and law. I also felt drawn to serving others which led to a Master’s degree in Counseling. I also dabbled working in the travel industry, and in elementary bilingual education, as well as in teaching English as a Second Language classes to high school aged kids and  adults. I had a passion for learning, which led me back to pursue a doctoral program in International Comparative Education.  I discovered from these experiences that I felt really “at home” in a university environment, to working with college students, and in the field of international education.  In this journey, I became a mother of two children and that was the best thing that could ever happen in my life.

So is being in international education my purpose? Or did I miss out on a fulfilling singing career? Looking back on my professional career, I realize that I often followed my gut on what came next and I was happy in my choices.  So I choose to look at this with no regrets. I choose to be happy right now. I choose to find  happiness in the everyday moments because it makes me happy over time. The core of finding purpose and passion is not about the career we choose or the number of kids we have, but what makes us feel joy. If you follow the joy, you’ll discover your purpose (or two or three)!  Life will be exciting!

Life is not meant to be planned out in detail and then struggle to make all of that happen. It just doesn’t work that way if you want to feel and be happy. While we can create intentions on what we want and visualize ourselves there, it’s so important to appreciate where we are right now for alignment in getting to where we want to be. When we appreciate, we find more good things that come our way and more to appreciate from it. In that journey, we may get inspired to do something else than what we originally intended. It’s all ok.

As you go through life appreciating, you will be inspired to follow certain paths. So follow your heart in what feels good to you. In the meantime, let’s find happiness in every day!

Happy New Year, 2017!

IMG_8302 (1)Join me this Monday, December 28th at 7:00 p.m. EST with other GoodVibeUniversity members while we celebrate the successes and joys of 2016 in a scripting call!  To learn more about scripting and how I use it in these new year’s calls, I explain my method in this handout called The Art of Scripting A New Year.

I highly recommend preparing for this call a few days ahead of time.

You can join in on the fun on Monday at:

Phone Number: (724) 444-7444 Call ID: 79357

http://www.talkshoe.com/tc/79357
Happy New Year!

I’m Tickled It’s Tuesday

Few Laughs Away quoteNo, it’s not yet Tuesday, but for some time now, I’ve played with words to feel good and have fun on Facebook. I take the day of the week and label it with something fun. My favorite is “Tickled Tuesdays” so I’ve decided to have my Giggle Fest & Manifest! calls on Tuesdays.

While they won’t be every Tuesday, they will always fall on a Tuesday (with the exception of any end of the year blessings call). I do these calls as part of Good Vibe University calls and if you don’t know about this community, you should check us out!  It’s a wonderful community of fellow deliberate creators created by Jeannette Maw, the Good Vibe Coach. To join in on my giggling calls or to listen to past calls, go to the “About” page or click below to take you to the TalkShoe site.

Giggle Fest & Manifest!

It’s only a half hour but guaranteed to raise your vibe. hee hee 🙂

I Appreciate My Life

How much and often are you appreciating YOUR life each day? I made this video to remind myself and others of the beautiful power of appreciation and love. EnJOY!

Your Emotional Grid

I’ve just completed another video that’s meant to be playful, fun and free.  It’s called “Your Emotional Grid,” based on Abraham-Hicks’ recent concepts of creating grids in deliberate creation. You use a grid when you want to get at the essence of what you desire, focusing on the general feeling place, not necessarily the specifics. If you get specific and it doesn’t feel good, then it’s time to go general and do some grid work.

I have been using the grid by focusing on good feelings and sitting with them. This video focused on my feelings of playful, free and beautiful. Those were the feelings I had when making it, so that’s my story today and I’m sticking to it! 🙂

When we get into a good feeling place, that’s the time to “milk it!”  Using Abraham-Hicks’ concept and practice of focusing on pure thought in increments of 17 seconds for faster manifesting,  this video was intended as a tool to be used to get in that good feeling place everyday, 17 seconds at a time.

Hope you enJOY it and use it a lot! 🙂

Your Emotional Grid

My Newest Video

I just finished my newest video tonight. It’s a promotion for my FREE “Giggle Fest & Manifest!” calls. Hee hee hee!

Get Happy: An Act of Self-Love

I have a nice 3-day weekend from my day job and took advantage of the opportunity to schedule one of my “Giggle Fest & Manifest!” calls during the daytime hours (instead of night). Attendance “live” on the calls has been spotty lately. I guess that people are not seeing the value of laughing on purpose – for no reason other than to get happy.

Today’s call was all about playing with the 22 emotions on Abraham-Hicks’ Emotional Guidance System. While I’ve felt disappointment (#12 on the scale) in the past in not having a consistent attendance on these calls, particularly from the high-vibing community at GoodVibeUniversity, today really felt different. I’m not disappointed at all.  In fact, I feel so good after my call that “disappointment” isn’t even on my radar.
My purpose in doing the scale was to “play” with the emotions we often take so seriously. It was intended as an act of self-love, as making the decision to get happy on purpose is really an act of self-love.
So on the eve of Valentine’s Day in 2012, I’m happy I cared enough about my well-being to honor my commitment to do the call alone by intentionally raising my vibe to one of joy, love, appreciation and empowerment (#1 on the scale). 
How will you love yourself today?
To listen to the recording of this call or past calls, you can find it below.

When Things Suck: A Glimpse Into “Allowing” A Break-Up

I know we’ve all had times in our lives when we feel as if things “suck.” I’m actually going through that now as it pertains to my relationship with someone I love very much. We have apparently broken up. I say “apparently,” because I’m still feeling shocked by it all and in disbelief. We had a great relationship. We always had so much fun! We loved each other passionately, joyfully, playfully and the feelings were alive. We could be who we are, without judgment, and allow each other the freedom to be ourselves and love, play, laugh and live life well! That was how I felt about “us.” This is how God (or Source) sees each and everyone of us everyday. 

Yet we’re human, and neither of us is seeing each other as God would see us right now and I’m certainly not seeing myself as Source sees me. When things don’t go the way we want them to in a relationship, (which recently happened in our case), it’s easy to place blame, point fingers at the other person, throw out accusations about how the other person didn’t act the way you wanted them to act, and judge. We judge our partner and each other. We judge ourselves. That is not a loving place to be in, yet why do we continually do this to ourselves? Why do we set ourselves up for disappointment by making what our partner does or doesn’t do, says or doesn’t say, the object of our happiness?– Can someone say “attachment” anyone?

We set ourselves up for disappointment by buying into that “ideal relationship” that many parts of society paint (or at least the part of our head or heart that imagines the ‘ideal’ relationship) and what happens? –The other person always disappoints. They disappoint because we can’t control other people: we can only control ourselves. They disappoint because we are different individuals who see and feel things in our own unique ways.

No one person is like you in every way! If I were involved with a guy who was exactly the same as me, I’d probably get bored really fast! So why would I expect someone else to act, be and approach the world in the same way as me? I don’t. Yet, in relationships with a partner, we often do expect the other person to react the same as we would!

Differences can be a good thing: they keep us growing, expanding and exploring this beautiful world in which we live. So if you’re complaining that your partner doesn’t see things your way, be glad that you’ve got someone in your life who contributes to your personal growth expansion by providing you with another point of view! I’m very appreciative of this man in my life:  he has enriched my life in so many ways, and often because of our differences.

Yet appreciating those differences can be a challenge during a “break-up,” “a fight” or otherwise while not understanding each other so well. It’s the differences in how we react to day-to-day things that often start disagreements and arguments in relationships. When that happens, things can really suck! We can spiral into a series of accusations, judgments, arguments and may use hurtful words. Then we run off to talk to our best friend and re-tell the story, over and over again, igniting the fire of the hurt, blame, judgment and sadness feelings even more. Now we’re really on a downward spiral, because we keep telling the story over and over again. And if you’re not one to talk to others, you probably have re-told the story over and over again in your mind, so your heart definitely feels it.

I’m reminded now of my all-time favorite quote from Abraham-Hicks: “My happiness depends upon me, so you’re off the hook!” I love that quote and I know in my soul that it’s true. I am in charge of my own happiness. I get to choose. I choose to appreciate this contrast (the break-up that I don’t want) and use this situation to align with my inner being and have the best year yet!

Yet right now, my relationship with the one that I love very much sucks. Yes, it sucks! It sucks because I disappointed him, and then he disappointed me and now it apparently is over.  You see? We both bought into that “You have to do ________(Fill in the blanks) to make me happy” mentality. In fact, because I didn’t do ________, he wasn’t happy with me and because he didn’t respond to me like __________, after I explained why I didn’t do _________ when he wanted me to ________,  I wasn’t happy with him.

See how ridiculously funny this is? Haha! Seeing it as a “fill in the blank” exercise illustrates just how silly we are to think we can control someone else. I can laugh about this but the truth is I miss him. I miss him because in our relationship, the love that flowed brought out the best in me: fun, caring, kind, loving, passionate, silly, playful, engaging, creative, inspiring, present and connected. That is worth appreciating.

Yet I’m not feeling that way about me right now. Can someone say “attachment” again, please? I have to “allow” me to be ME: all those qualities that our love brought up in ME. I have to allow those in again, without the NEED for the relationship. Tricky stuff.

I write this here because it feels good for me to do so (and I know that following my “feel good” is the way to aligning with my true self!) I intend that readers who are drawn to read my words will find benefit from it. While I am a person who helps others with tools and tips for living a more positive, joyful life, I am having a challenge being joyful about this break-up. It’s not what I want, so I’m determined to use the tools that I know to get myself into a “feel better” place as I go through this. I am intending that I’ll get so good at appreciating this contrast of breaking up, that I can love him and myself by “allowing” the break-up: no need, no attachment to outcome, and whether we reconcile won’t matter anymore because divine love will be what I feel and appreciate in this situation. In other words, if I see myself, him and our relationship as God or Source sees us, then I’ve paved the way to seeing us as we truly are: magnificent beings living a life that’s supposed to be fun and filled with love: with or without each other as a “couple.”

What I know will serve me is this: releasing the need for this relationship in my life, the attachment to him specifically as my “way to happiness,”  the  “need” for his love: and the more I can allow, the better I will feel! Will we get back together? Perhaps….Perhaps not…. But letting go of the attachment of our relationship as the key to my happiness IS the key to my own happiness!  I can be happy by myself, thank you!

Abraham-Hicks says that when we are so conscious of “what is” and when “what is” doesn’t feel good, it is helpful to get more generally negative about the situation to move ourselves into alignment to a better feeling place. So that’s why I’m calling this post “When Things Suck: A Glimpse Into ‘Allowing’ A Break-Up.” I’m moving my vibe more generally negative (as opposed to re-telling the specifics of what happened). So here’s my rant:

This really sucks! I hate when things suck. It sucks to feel this way. This whole situation sucks. I don’t like it at all because it sucks! Yet I’ve had other “sucky” situations before and they didn’t stay “sucky” forever. Things did get better in the past so they can get better now.  This won’t always suck. Not everything in my life sucks. In fact, many things in my life don’t suck at all! Eventually this situation will move from “sucky” to “hopeful.” I know what to do – I’ve done it before…..but right now it sucks and I’m not liking it. My future is filled with all kinds of goodies and here I sit, sad about this situation. If only I could find my way to turn this sucker around! What if I knew exactly what to do with this sucker?


LOL  Ok, that made me laugh. 🙂 There’s hope in this sucker afterall…


19,106 EMAILS!

Have you taken a look at your email inbox lately? I have! Yesterday I had 19,106 emails in my GMail account and by the end of the day, I had reduced it to 11,664. While that number left may seem high, I am so excited and relieved to know that I cleared out 7,442 emails, all in one day! It feels really good to clear out a big chunk of that “virtual clutter,” and now I’ve learned some useful tools to continue to clear away the rest.

What does clearing out emails have to do with spirituality and why am I writing about it here on my blog? Isn’t it just an example that I’m disorganized?

A lot has been written about clutter and “getting organized.” There are professional organizers who assist people in clearing and organizing their “stuff.” There are shows on television that help people “get organized.” (The hoarder shows are dealing with deep, psychological issues, so I’m not including them in this list.)  If you look around, you will find many articles and magazines usually giving space to “getting organized” or “decluttering.” So it’s clearly a topic that most can relate to.

Yet when we buy into the idea that we are disorganized and need to “get organized,” we run the risk of not loving ourselves.  There is nothing wrong with becoming more organized, but too often I’ve heard people criticize themselves over their lack of “organization” of their physical clutter. So there’s often a lot of self-hatred going on associated with clutter and the notion that we are “less than perfect” when we don’t know how to “organize” it. So if you’re feeling a sense of “I’m not good enough” (or) “There must be something wrong with me” associated with your need for “organization,” that’s a clue to be easy on yourself and more loving.

So I decided to share my journey with clearing my inbox publicly so that others can see that they are not alone: that there is nothing wrong with them that needs to be “fixed,” and that the clearing process is really an act of self-love. Once you start to feel that shift toward doing this as a way to honor and love yourself,  you can more easily shift and accept tips from “organizers,” too.

One can be “organized” and still have “clutter” in their lives. What physically appears “organized” may actually be draining your energy if you no longer love it, for example. Clutter is not always about our physical “stuff,” either. Clutter can show up in our relationships, our minds, our bodies, in our energy and in our inboxes! I’ve been learning a lot from Sue Rasmussen, a life coach whose motto is “Making Room for What Matters.” As part of her “Clearing Out Day” for July (which is part of a larger 12-month program called Streamline Your Success), we focused on virtual clutter. I chose to work on my Gmail account.

It was my first Clear Out Day, so I was excited. I actually had organized many of my emails into folders and could easily find the topic and the email threads I was searching. Did I have time to read all that came into my email box? – No! Had I spent a lot of time lately not bothering to read most of what came into my email box? -Yes! So these were signs to me that my Gmail account was no longer serving me, I no longer loved it and the entire thing felt “heavy” and “overwhelming” to me, so I knew it was time to clear it out.

While I go to my Gmail account often and knew I had a lot in there, I didn’t realize how “cluttered” it really was until I did this exercise. I felt a bit embarrassed to see 19,106 emails in there (and I wasn’t even using the “archive” function!), but I quickly got over that, because I’m doing this for me: to make room for more joy in my life, to rid myself of background clutter that doesn’t serve me anymore, to clear the energy so that I can allow more love and joy in. In essence, it is part of my personal development journey-part of my journey as The Spirited Strider and totally related to loving myself. In clearing clutter, I can more easily be me.

Since I had so many emails, I decided to go with Sue’s “fast pass method” which is a quick scanning of items and quickly making decisions about them. I wanted to feel better fast, so this worked for me. (I have become quite good at this lately, as I recently cleared out my mother’s storage unit and had limited time to do so.) For the items that I couldn’t make a quick decision about, I utilized Sue’s filing system to label them to peruse later. I quickly realized that I was subscribed to way too many ezines and newsletters so I began by labeling them into a folder that I returned to at the end of the day. At the end of the day, I had 53 items in that folder, and went back to “unsubscribe” to 34 of them already. So that folder is now down to 19 items that I will make decisions on over the course of this week.

Deciding to unsubscribe from newsletters is not always an easy task. I have connections with many of the people, but honestly, I had way too much clutter to actually read their work! So I made a decision to only keep a few: those that I always read at this current time. I attracted Sue and her “Streamline Your Success” program into my life and her newsletter is one I’m keeping! While many of other newsletters I used to read, I had way too many to read them all now. I can always go back and change my mind again. I am of the mindset that if it is beneficial to me, it will come back to me and if I’m inspired again to subscribe to it, I will. Besides, by that time, I may find that my list of “newsletters that I always read” may change. But now I have the tools I need to feel good about my inbox and clear it more regularly so that it doesn’t pile up like it had these past few years.

What was really revealing for me was the amount of emails I had from forums at my favorite online places to hang out: GoodVibeUniversity and Facebook. Most of those emails were notifications from forum threads I had “subscribed” to or from Facebook email notification settings.  I had long ago changed my Facebook settings and this past week or so, I changed the GoodVibeUniversity forum thread subscriptions. What I had NOT done was to go back and delete all those emails, however. Thus, there were many, many emails in there that were easily cleared.

I discovered the easiest way to find these emails was to do two searches using “notification” and “notifications” in the “Search Email” tab on GMail. Hundreds and yes, thousands of emails appeared when I did that! You can quickly scan to be sure there isn’t something you want to keep (as other notifications may appear there that you want to keep), but it was very fast and easy to clear when I realized it half-way through my Clearing Day.

When we clear the clutter around us and within, one can feel the energetic shift. While I felt a bit in shock at the initial site of 19,106  emails, I quickly shifted that to excitement that I was going to feel a whole lot better after this exercise–and feel better I did! I felt like a weight had been lifted and I felt quite inspired to share with others. This process is empowering!

I also found that I was really tired at the end of the day: not only because I was at the computer doing repetitive work, but also because I had cleared a lot of clutter energy that had been weighing me down.  I had made some decisions to rid myself of virtual clutter that I previously I had no time for, yet had been very aware that it was there. So listening to my feelings about my inbox let me know that I needed to feel better about it by clearing some of that clutter out. In essence, that feeling of “I have to get around to reading that” was gone and that was a huge relief and I’m feeling excited to clearing more.

Abraham-Hicks knows the power of reaching for a feeling of relief to feel better. When we reach for a feeling of relief, we are moving up the emotional scale and raising our vibration.  That’s exactly how this process felt to me: each round of Clear Out Day felt like moving up the scale toward more relief, more relief, more relief…and then feeling really good about the day in general.

When we feel better, we attract more things and people that make us feel better.  So while I have 11,664 emails to go, I’m feeling great about 7,442 that are gone and from what I’ve learned from this process. I now have the tools to work on the 11,664 that remain and can’t wait to make room for more excitement and joy in my life!

Please feel free to share your own insights, comments and suggestions for others on this common type of clutter or how you regularly reach for a feeling of relief!